Thursday, May 14, 2009

To Know Her is To Love Her

I have to break my fast from blogging to wish my mom, Sweet Kay, a happy birthday.

There are both many and few words to tell you about my mom but I thought I'd let some photos do the talking. If you were to meet her, you might wrongly assume that she is either quiet or judging, because she might not say much at your first meeting. But she's neither: my mom can be shy. But this lasts only until the two of you have sat down and begun to talk about your life. She is excellent at asking questions and her demeanor is one that puts you at ease immediately, especially if a cup of coffee or a glass of wine are involved! At a large party she will stand in the background and wait for a one on one conversation with someone. She's the perfect match to my dad, the spotlight junkie. :)

I have no idea when exactly my mom came into her deep faith. She wasn't raised, like I was, with conversations about God at the dinner table. I know she began her relationship with Him in high school, as a result of dating my father. She's not the kind who delves into theological debates, though she surely can hold her own, but her spiritual strength is very quiet and sturdy. Every time I spend a meal with her, we end up talking about what God has been saying to her and I come away encouraged and convicted. She's not brassy with it - it's more like spending time around her can feel like a mini-retreat for my soul!

She LOVES to laugh. She probably won't want me to share with you but she thoroughly enjoys raunchy humor. Fart jokes? Man, you'll win her friendship for life. She is the antithesis of the "preacher's wife" in so many ways. I have no idea how she's lived the "life in the fishbowl" for over 30 years...but she has. She can be the perfect dichotomy: able to explain the prophecies in Isaiah over a nice Amaretto sour. Just don't tell anyone that she can't play a single hymn on the piano!

Remember that old Saturday Night Live skit with Mike Myers in the store called, "If It's Not Scottish, It's Crap"? Well, my mom loves the UK. She passed along to me a sort of anglophilia, the love of all things British and Scottish. Some of my favorite memories are being in England, Scotland, and Wales with her.

She IS a scholar: she has her Masters in English and to this day teaches classes at Weatherford college. One of the best gifts I have as a result of being her daughter is the joy of reading. If I am raving about a good book, chances are my mom passed it along to me.

Much like my BFF Katy, my mom often gets a totally blank look on her face when she's thinking. She is slow to process, a good match for me who is as discerning with my words as a bull coming out of the shoots at a rodeo. There has not been a single problem I've encountered that I haven't at some point taken to my mother. She is, without a doubt, the BEST listener I know. She is the opposite of judgmental (except when she's driving - then she might condemn all other drivers to hell for certain minor sins...Momma don't like traffic!) and is careful not to "fix" my problems when I bring them to her. My brother and I both know: when you're in a pickle, call Dad. When you just need to vent, call Mom.

My mom knew Russell was my husband before I did. It was because of her that I even began to think romantically of him. She is WISE.

She's also good at Mommy stuff. She has patience that I don't possess. But you will, at some point, hear her SIGH. That's it. She won't complain...but you'll know by that sigh that you're pushing it.

She's quick to forgive. I love that quality in people. She's a lover, not a fighter.

If you know my mom, you can leave a shout-out! And I guarantee, if she knows you, she loves you. She takes a shine to all who love on her cubs...that's the quickest way to her heart. I'm so glad I'll get some time with her today. I'm 33 years old but I still need my Momma!

I Love you, Momma Kay!


Shauna said...

Well I agree with every word Becky and very well said. She is one of the best friends I have ever had. Who would have thought that the Lord would place two people so far in age and so totally different to be the lifter of each others souls. She has been that solid rock for me. I think her and Craig are just as good of friends. Possibly they came from the same hobbit family. Just want you to know your momma is a huge blessing to me.

Katy said...

How precious and sweet, Beckles! You and I both share the fact that we have such a big place in our heart for our moms. I love that!

Momma Kay, I want to wish you a Happy Birthday. I do hope you know how much you are loved. I know Becky's words in this post just scratch the surface of how she feels about you. You have touched so many lives of those around you - definitely mine! Just thinking of you makes me smile :)

May God bless you greatly this year!

dianeroutson said...

Oh, Becky, once again your essay brought tears to my eyes. What a wonderful tribute from daughter to mother. I know your Mama as my younger sister, and though we grew up together, it's only been as adults that we've come to truly know each other. You're right! She is a blessing, a good friend, a great mom and now grandmom. It's interesting that you describe her as shy. I was known as the shy one growing up -- your mom was, to me, much more social. I know she always made me laugh, and I will love her forever for that and for being a special sister and an even better friend. Happy Birthday to my dear sister, Kay, and your Mama! May God Bless you all.

Andy and Cari said...

Thanks for loving coming to my blog...I love seeing the same names in the comment box! Your baby girl is beautiful!