Things I Swear By: Tanning Lotion - ADDENDUM

Wow. The response to the post on tanning lotion has surprised me just a bit. I'm still getting texts and emails about it today. Ladies, you are some tannin' fools...and I love ya for it.

To all of you who went right out, bought the lotion, and immediately bathed in it, then let me apologize for not giving a proper tutorial. I didn't realize how many of you were that anxious to turn your pale, wintry skin into lovely, bronze skin...I am now drunk with power knowing that if I suggest rubbing yourself with squirrel feces to rid yourself of cellulite, some of you will immediately run out your backdoors with your bebe guns.

First of all, I'm sorry to those of you whose husbands mocked you, whether for your scent or for the tinges of orange you received.

Second, I should have warned you more clearly: USE SPARINGLY until you see how it looks on you. This lotion is meant to intensify after 3 days. Give it time! Also, because you cannot see the immediate results, make sure you rub it in evenly.

Oh and p.s.: I learned the hard way that if you use this on your feet and you have either pale or no nail polish on, you will turn your toenails a shade of brown. And you will be stuck at a luxury resort looking like white trash, right Katy?

And So It Begins...

From this..


To this...


Last night at church I got a phone call to come to the nursery: "Umm, Momma...can you come down and feed Miss Davy for us?"

You can always tell when your child has been "challenging" to the nursery workers if when you show up she is in the stroller getting pushed around. That means that she's been so fussy that they chauffeured her away from the other children in an attempts to quiet her down.

Upon arrival, I saw Davy sitting in a double stroller with another distraught baby boy. Davy began grinning ear to ear the moment she saw me. But the nursery lady wasn't smiling. She told me, with no small amount of awe in her voice, that Davy had torn the crying boy's bottle out of his little paws not once, or twice, but three times and shoved it into her gaping maw. I suppressed a belly laugh upon hearing this but Davy began kicking her feet and smiling at me as I said, "Uh oh. We don't take other people's food!" Pretty sure that fell on deaf ears.

I've noticed that she gets anxious about nursing now. She begins hollering and pawing at me the minute I get her from her crib. When I am bringing her baby food, she kicks and reaches for the spoon like "must. have. that." So I'm not really surprised about her shenanigans in the nursery. I mean, HELLO? I think I know where she gets this from...

ACK! People, while I was writing this Davy ate off the corner of a baby shower invitation that was sitting next to my laptop!! There isn't a trace of it in her mouth!!!

My mom noted that the story reminded her of Chris Farley in this skit.

"Dude, I Just Twoted!"

This is so true...me included. I don't even understand why I Twitter.

Thanks to Amber...

This One's For You, Michael Paul

My husband and his brother have an uncanny talent of meeting someone and immediately ascribing a celebrity look-alike to them. For example, when Russ and I first began dating, Michael shared with me that I looked like the character Stands With a Fist from the movie "Dances With Wolves."


I tried not to hate Michael in that moment.

So I guess Mary McDonnell, aka Stands With a Fist, is my celebrity look-alike, or as I like to call her, "Ugly Becky." (no offense to Mary McDonnell but she looks pretty haggard in that movie and I choose not to believe that I resemble a 52 year old, talented actress)

This morning I saw a D-list celebrity on tv and told Russ, that girl looks like an ugly (name of a friend we have). Then I asked him if he could think of an Ugly Russ. Here's who he came up with:


Listen, my husband is MUCH more handsome than Mark Chesnutt, the country singer. But I love that he had this guy in mind when I asked him the question!

So, I'll ask you: is there a celebrity that might be an ugly version of you? (Again, let's just assume that we all have great self-esteem and we mean no offense to any celebrities!)

In closing, we have never been able to watch Lost without calling Hurley the "fat Michael Page." So Michael, I'll answer the above question for you here:


Just so you don't think I'm needlessly cruel - here's a photo from our wedding of the two boys...see? They're very handsome.

Little Ella Girl

One of my besties, Andrea, is needing your prayers for her daughter, Ella. Most of you who read my blog will know immediately who Andrea & Ella are but just in case you don't, please go to Andrea's blog to read about her little girl:

The Mitchells Blog

When Ella was born she suffered from seizures that hurt her brain...which led to a diagnosis of Cerebral Palsy. (that's my very non-medical explanation) She has been such a light and a joy to her family and so many others. But this morning Andrea's babysitter/caretaker discovered Ella in her bed, seizing. They called 911 and EMTs rushed her to the hospital. This is the same hospital that Ella was born in, the same one that she first went into seizures just after her birth. It's where she spent weeks before being released to come home with her Mom and Dad. As you can imagine, just being there brings about hard memories for Andrea and Joe, her Daddy.

The timing, as if it could be anything else, is terrible. Ella is weeks from her 3rd birthday. She has been accepted into a program that uses a special kind of therapy/education to work with children with disabilities. You can read here how Andrea was processing through Ella's comprehension issues. I know she is really scared about how the seizures this morning have effected Ella's brain now.

Please pray with me: I'm asking the Lord to supernaturally protect and heal Ella's brain. I'm praying for Joe and Andrea, that they would take comfort in the only One Who has the power to heal and Who understands Ella's condition better than anyone. Pray for renewed strength, as both of them are worn out emotionally and physically. Pray for optimism from the doctors and wisdom as they look at the CT scans and possible EEGs. And I know that my friends desire above all things to be a light to others, to allow their struggles to shine light on Jesus and His goodness.

Thank you, friends. If anything, it is such a comfort to know that you will read and pray - even for people you've never met.

Things I Swear By: Tanning Lotion

A few folks have asked about my tan legs, so I thought I'd share my secret here. I used to be a sun addict. I've had three surgeries to remove skin cancer (Basal Cell Carcinoma) to prove it. Like all other sorority girls at Texas Tech in the 90s, I had a tanning membership. During my twenties I worked at a summer camp teaching water skiing and rarely used sunscreen. I know, I know. Absolutely terrible. So I am not allowed to be in the sun these days without SPF 900. But I'm also a firm believer in the old adage, "tan fat looks better than pale fat."

Enter my daily self-esteem saver:

Okay, listen: you need to get the Medium to Dark kind and it is important that you apply a small amount. I usually put less than a dime-size into my palm for one leg. I DO NOT apply on my knees but rub in the lotion until my hands feel dry. The lotion will go on like any normal lotion, leaving no streaks or orange places so you will need to rub it in well, leaving no place "un-lubed." I use sparingly on my chest and arms but it's the legs that I'm typically most concerned with. The great thing about this specific Jergens lotion (NOTE: Natural Glow Express) is that in 3 days you look as if you have a very natural tan. It's much better than the regular Natural Glow lotion.

ps: please, after application, wash your hands extra carefully, paying special attention to the spaces in between your fingers!

pps: Katy, I hear you already complaining about the smell...it smells NICE!

Stuff on Repeat in My Mind

So I think this will be the third time that I've brought up Isaiah 53 here. I don't know why, but it's the only thing I've been reading since the week before Easter. In seminary we would read volumes upon volumes of biblical commentary in a mere day. I think that's why I now find myself sticking to just a few verses in a month, hoping they will stick and that I'll miraculously "get it".

More than anything, I keep returning to the first three verses of that chapter. The ones that describe the origins of Jesus and also his appearance. I realize that the American church understands that Jesus was simple, that he wasn't a glam god. But I'm not sure we get that there really was nothing about him that would have even caused us to take a second glance. In my mind, I keep thinking that were I to have lived during His time here, say, one of Mary Magdalene's girlfriends, that I would have been undeniably drawn to Him. I imagine that once He said your name, you simply were enamoured of Him.

I'm starting to think that's untrue.

One of my sweet Bible profs at Dallas Seminary has written it this way in reference to verse 3 ("He was despised and rejected by men"):

The English word "despised" carries strong emotional overtones, but its Hebrew source means to be considered worthless and unworthy of attention. The Servant would not be the object of scorn, Isaiah meant, though He was that (Mark 10:33; Luke 18:31-33), as much as He would be hastily dismissed. People would reject Him because they would not see Him as having any significance for them (6:10; John 1:10-11; 12:37-41). They would not give Him a second look. (Dr. Constable, notes on Isaiah)

See? The set-up was such that I just wouldn't have noticed Jesus at all. Sort of like how I don't notice the gas station attendant or Target check-out girl. The picture at the top of this post? I found it while searching for a depiction of Jesus that would look very unlike the ones we have in our mind. When you look at it, does it bother you like it does me? I don't like it. But I think that's good that it bothers me - because it brings home the point that Isaiah is making. By the way, I found that picture on a website for Atheists. :)

Then Dr. Constable takes verse 3 a step further ("...a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering. Like one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not."):

People would also avoid the Servant because He would appear to them as one who had His own problems. Since He knew pain and grief, others would conclude that He was not in a position to help them. He would appear to them as a loser, and who goes to a loser for help or looks to one for leadership? This description does not mean that the Servant would always be sickly and morose (cf. 1:5-6). It means that the way He presented Himself would not lead people to look to Him for strength. (Constable, Isaiah)

Wow. I'd never thought of that. I'd never realized just how much of a loser people presumed Jesus to be. Maybe I've focused too much on the idea that folks followed Him and haven't given credo to the humongous amount of faith that must have required...to follow someone that others saw as a big loser. I spend quite a bit of time ensuring that NO ONE presumes me as a loser. In fact, I'd say it's a major goal in my life to be perceived as freakin' awesome.

One of my strongest neuroses is my desire/need for others to not just look fondly upon me, but to see me as incredible, amazing, utterly worthy and the BEST. I'm serious. I can head into a tailspin when I think that someone doesn't respect me or sees me as anything less than completely kickass.

I am so unlike Jesus. That's why my heart is saddened to read these verses. I'm so fixated on the public persona that I present to the public (wow, that's a lot of p's) that I miss out on allowing the Holy Spirit to conform me to the likeness of Christ. And yet my heart also rejoices over these verses because when I read them, there is a sense of paradox - our knowledge that the One Who was despised is also the One Who is the most beautiful, the One Who has all power and dominion. And He is coming.

So come, Lord Jesus.

Cousins

IMG_1258, originally uploaded by beckpage.

Bowhead

IMG_1241, originally uploaded by beckpage.

Munchkin Fix

IMG_1235, originally uploaded by beckpage.

Before Easter Sunday service at Wedgwood.

Some Feel Good To Go With Your Coffee

Go Here.

She doesn't look like a show-stopper, does she? I am so gladly reminded that sometimes the most beautiful things come out of someone whose worth I didn't understand at first glance. And yes, we are so cynical.

This reminds me of one of my favorite themes in life: the underdog, the unlikely one. All my favorite movies have this theme. Frodo was the Ring-bearer. Harry was the Chosen One. I cry every time Francis Ouimet wins the U.S. Open in "The Greatest Game Ever Played". It's the Cinderella story done a thousand times over.

Just don't forget where this idea of the unlikely one, the one we laughed at or doubted or didn't trust, came into being...

He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him. (Isaiah 53: 2)

A Little Honesty For the Here and Now

Ohhh, folks. Do you ever have those days when you are all out of sorts, more than tired, and simply down on yourself? I had one of those afternoons yesterday. The bummer was that it fell after a lovely morning when I had breakfast by myself at Corner Bakery and spent time delighting in a passage from the Bible. Those kinds of mornings are very rare (I had a client cancellation) and I thought that the rest of the day would be as blissful and sweet.

It wasn't.

By last night I began to recognize some depressing thoughts. I had gone from a feeling of contentment to the belief that I was a bad wife, mother, counselor and friend. I had a long list of phone calls, both work-related and personal, that I had yet to return. I felt overwhelmed by the idea that, "I'm letting everyone down." I forgot to baste the chicken breasts and they were dry after being grilled. "I'm a terrible cook - Russ must get so tired of my lack of creativity in the kitchen." I was bone-tired and had decided to miss a standing girl's night where I receive both accountability and true friendship. "They are going to be mad at me - they're going to think I don't really care about them."

And sometimes I read over other blogs that I typically enjoy and suddenly find myself comparing my life to the lives of these other women (who I don't know, don't share life with) ...and I end up feeling terrible. How do they have the time to have beautiful gardens, impromptu photo sessions with their children that look professional, the latest fashions, decorating skills, sewing "how-to's" and homemade recipes? Why do I feel so pitifully crappy in comparison?

See? I told you I was in a bad headspace.

I came across this poem here today.

Song for a Fifth Child.

Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing, make up the bed,
Sew on a button and butter the bread.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She's up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.

Oh, I've grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue,
Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo

The shopping's not done and there's nothing for stew
And out in the yard there's a hullabaloo
But I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo
Look! Aren't his eyes the most wonderful hue?
Lullabye, rockaby lullabye loo.

The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow
But children grow up as I've learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs; Dust go to sleep!
I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.

(by Ruth Hulburt Hamilton)

It caught my breath a little. Tears sprang to my eyes. I felt validated. Because yesterday I made up a song for Davy and sang it to her and she laughed the whole way through. We took a walk and she babbled the whole time. I am choked up just thinking about the fact that she isn't comparing me to anyone else. I'm her Momma and I'm all she knows.

I have battled performance-driven Christianity for so long and I make my living showing people the way out of that madness. And yet here I am, blindsided by it again. What I mean by that is that it only takes a few hours for my thoughts to go from believing that my Savior has ransomed me from a belief that I have to work for His approval, for His love... to trying to earn it. He has given it to me freely and because it cost Him His very own life, He is hurt and offended when I attempt to prove myself to Him.

This little bit of honesty comes after posts upon posts of self-bragging, trying so hard to prove that I'm a cool, funny, intelligent person. Just being real, y'all. This train of thought probably appears a little jumbled and addled. That's okay. It only proves that I need my Savior badly - that I need His rescue from a world that judges me according to what I can DO, instead of Whose child I am.



(I put this photo on here for 2 reasons: One, because I am reminded that I don't love my mom for her cooking, cleaning, or any other motherly talent. I love her because she's my Momma! And two, so that you can see a little of the resemblance between D and I.)

Help a Sista Out!

A dear friend of mine is one of those folks who just has an eye for the aesthetic, whether it be photography, art, music, food or decorating. She was the stud who helped me paint my living room by spotlight late one evening. She is the person who I'd call to help me bring about some individuality and originality in my home.

She's entered Apartment Therapy's "Small Cool 2009" contest. If you have time, go check out her home & vote for her!

The Paradoxes of God

This morning my dad preached on Romans 8 and the paradox of the knowledge that "we face death all day long, we are like sheep to the slaughter" and "who can separate us from the love of Christ?...In all these things we are more than conquerors.." Death versus conquering. It doesn't seem to make sense. And this is the walk of the believer.

In light of this, I am asking you to pray for someone I've never met. Please lift up Cari and her husband Andy. They lost their little baby girl last fall to a seizure and just over a week ago Cari woke up to her husband having a seizure. He was diagnosed with a brain tumor and has just had surgery to remove it. It doesn't seem fair. My first thought is to run to God, "Lord! You must have made a grave mistake here! They can't take this, especially now!" Surely He didn't mean to give them double sorrow, double fears.

This life with Him is a paradox. But we know that there is nothing that can pull us from His grasp and we know that Messiah has provided victory over the last enemy to be destroyed: death.

If you go check out Cari's blog, pray also for her health as she is pregnant with a little boy due soon. I took the time to read over the archives of her blog tonight and my faith has been strengthened. (my t-shirt is stained with mascara but it was worth it)

Good Friday

My favorite passage on Jesus is from Isaiah 53. And my favorite verses from that passage are 5 and 6:
⁵ But he was pierced for our transgressions,
he was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was upon him,
and by his wounds we are healed.

⁶ We all, like sheep, have gone astray,
each of us has turned to his own way;
and the LORD has laid on him
the iniquity of us all.

I'm so grateful that the story doesn't end on Friday!

She has nothing to do with this post. I was just trying to take a pretty photo outdoors. Her look is all thirteen years old: "Mo-THER. This is so lame."

I love this!* Look at all their little faces, so earnest, so eager to sing. I really believe anyone can be a great singer with some good instruction. God bless that music teacher. I remember all my music teachers through the years!

Here are the lyrics if you're wondering. It's a song about humility, about the fall from grace. It calls to mind old Nebuchadnezzar in Daniel 4. This rendition is just as good as the one Coldplay performed at their concert back in November!

Viva La Vida
I used to rule the world
Seas would rise when I gave the word
Now in the morning I sleep alone
Sweep the streets I used to own

I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing
"Now the old king is dead! Long live the king!"

One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castles stand
Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand

I hear Jerusalem bells a ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field

For some reason I can't explain
Once you go there was never
Never an honest word
And that was when I ruled the world

It was the wicked and wild wind
Blew down the doors to let me in
Shattered windows and the sound of drums
People couldn't believe what I'd become

Revolutionaries wait
For my head on a silver plate
Just a puppet on a lonely string
Oh who would ever want to be king?

I hear Jerusalem bells a ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field

For some reason I can't explain
I know Saint Peter won't call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world

I hear Jerusalem bells a ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field

For some reason I can't explain
I know Saint Peter won't call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world

*thanks, Rob!

Tales From the Crib

When Davy was born our friends Kent & Emily were dog-sitting Fatty and at some point during that first night in the hospital I received a photo of Fatty on my phone with the word, "sister?"

He's been so good. She has a wicked addiction to grabbing his ears. You can see she's mid-grab. We try to praise him when he lets her pull them.

I'm guessing they taste like butter - sweet, furry, velvety butter.

Getting even.

In more homefront news, D began crawling today. My life just suddenly got a little crazier.

Reviving my Faith in Humanity

I've known Andrew since he was 7 years old. It's hard for me to believe that he's graduating from high school next month. But every time I read his blog I'm just so encouraged that someone his age is not only such an excellent writer, but so tender-hearted and sensitive to God's voice. Go check him out and remember that I believe the children are our future...

Looking Forward to This...

My close friends know that it was the movie "Knocked Up" that made me want to try to get pregnant. (That and two glasses of wine plus a hormone or four.) "Funny People" has the added bonus of one of my favorite actors, Jason Schwartzman.



Thanks, A Cup of Jo.

Uniform

Over the past two days I have worn the same exact outfit. The only thing that has changed has been the t-shirt and socks. At the pediatrician's office the sweet nurse asked, "Oh, you look comfy - did you just come from working out?" Ummm, not really.

REI fleece vest - because it's been a little chilly this week - low 60s to 70s.



Russ has noted that these Adidas running tights have become my wardrobe staple when I'm not working. Um, Russ? Just be glad it's not a bathrobe.
Mmmm, Asics Kayanos. I could wear you everyday.

People, I sure hope you don't buy running shoes for how they look or for what's discounted. If you take your feet seriously (and your back and your knees) then you need to buy running shoes from a store that will fit you according to your gait and stability. Might I suggest Run On?

I will finally return to coaching a running class in two weeks. I really cannot believe how badly I've missed running - and running with others. I'll keep you posted on how running affects our new eating habits...we'll see if I lose weight more quickly.

5:30am is gonna feel really early now that Lil' Bit has been sleeping through the night for 2 months.

Prayers Needed

Everyday I read the blogs of a set of twin sisters: Darby and Erika. I've never met them but we have several mutual friends who attended Auburn with them both. These girls are both talented in their own rights, one a mommy and the other an interior designer & soon to be mommy. Today Erika's husband Chance has suffered a fall that's left him with bleeding on the brain. You can read an update on Darby's blog (see above) but either way, say a prayer for Chance right now. After the sad incident with Natasha Richardson, I know a brain injury is terribly scary for them.

Hiatus

So...I took a little break...sort of unintended. I have been feeling somewhat worn down after a week of poor sleep. But after going to bed at 9:30pm for two nights in a row, here I am!

Little recap:


Ricky was in town for a portion of Spring Break. He got to see Miss Chunk in all of her chubby glory. (We were low on laundry that day. I promise I don't usually dress her in the free tee from Baylor hospital and just a diaper...I'm a little bit white trash, but not full blown.) We're all going to see Ricky graduate from the University of Arkansas (Go Hogs!) in May.


We drove to San Angelo two weekends ago to visit Sutton & Johnna. This one photo captures the entire visit: it was all about being laid back, comfy and simply enjoying them. Davy was great - she slept, she barely cried, and she got plenty of attention. We ate lots of heavenly food (not Dr. Brown approved) and paid the price for it. But my favorite part was having plenty of time to simply sit and talk. That's one of our favorite things to do with them. I loved that I caught a shot of Johnna with a camera since she is our family historian, a talented scrapbooker, writer, and creative mind as you can see here.


Remember how Davy got a new jumper? One day while I was working on my Spring cleaning she was being awfully vigilant in her jumping skills. I noticed she enjoyed spinning round and round in the bouncer. I stepped out on the front porch to sweep and got caught for no more than 3 minutes talking to a neighbor. When I came back in a quick look let me know that D was still happy and content. A second look piqued my curiosity: what WAS that stuff?

Prunes. From an hour before. It appears the spinning worked it's magic on that little tummy. Here's my question: how do you puke that much and not even lose your pacifier? "W'sup, Mom?"

For anyone still reading, we had to re-do our family room this weekend. What worked pre-baby was no longer working. Also? We felt terribly cramped in our charming 1600 sq. ft. 1930s home. This table used to sit against the back wall displaying what was probably too many family photos.


Here is the room mid-move. I ran to get my camera and Russ goes,
"What are you DOING?"
"I need it for the blog!" (He doesn't understand that everyone enjoys a good before and after!)

Our couch used to float mid room with a walkway behind it and that table up against the back wall. Why? I don't really know. It worked for the first 2 years. But then the pack n play was jammed somewhere between the floating couch and the fireplace. The whole room began feeling claustrophobic. But here are some after pics.


The photo table has been removed and the couch pushed back against the wall. That chair used to be in front of one of the corner windows.


The table that once showcased an over-display of photos got downsized (I love that table - it can serve as a dining table or a card table!) and is now in the corner where the other chair used to be. The pack n play is still a major fixture but, hey! that's life for a little while. (Let's be honest - it's only going to get worse, right?)

P.S. Russ will read this and call "bull$*t" on me if I don't confess that one of the main reasons I haven't updated my blog is because the only time I've been online lately is to play Mafia on Facebook. I am filled with shame to right this. but if you want to play will you let me know so that I can add you to my Mafia?